Week 5 – Pink Cadillac Creative Courage Challenge

“Success comes to those who dare to act.  It seldom goes to the timid who are afraid of the consequences.”  ~ Jawaharlal Nehru

Pink Cadillac, Hot Rod Lincoln, Little Red Corvette, 455 Rocket….there are so many songs about cars, and they bring up wonderful memories of days gone by, cars we had when we were younger….and sometimes they inspire us to dream about what we might have someday…. What type of car elicits a sigh at the mere sight of it? Does the rumble of a powerful engine make your heart race? Is there a feeling of luxury that you enjoy when you are in a certain car? Do you know what your dream car is?

If you could have any car miraculously appear in your driveway tomorrow…what car might that be? A brand new model, or perhaps a vintage car from yester year, a larger family car, a muscle car, a monster truck or a mini sports car? Really think about it for a moment….take your time…..I’ll be right here when you get back…….

If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1000 MPG. ~ Bill Gates

What do you believe is the reason that your dream car is not sitting in your driveway right now?  Generally the answers to that question are:  I can’t afford the type of car I want, It’s not practical, it uses too much gas, they don’t make the model any longer or a multitude of other bargaining, reasoning or negative speak that we do with our inner selves when we are uncertain about something, or don’t believe we deserve something….This week we are going to talk briefly about intention, possibilities, dreaming,  desire….and then we are going to have a stimulating and  truly exhilarating challenge!

“Intention rules the earth.” ~ Oprah

What Oprah says is true, intentions do rule the earth! The problem arises when we aren’t quite sure of what we actually want.  This question… “what do you want?” is universally known to throw even the most enlightened of people…and there are several things we may unknowingly be doing that limits us and keeps us from figuring out that critical question!

What the heck DO you want? Until you can answer that question for yourself, it cannot possibly become yours. When we use intention to draw things to us, but limit our thinking, the power that would be going to our intention is being misdirected, distracted, and flying by without hitting their mark. So we must learn to use our intentions correctly and powerfully. When we do that, we can attain anything!

I subscribe to a regular newsletter from Christine Kane, she is a wonderful life coach with an inspiring personality!  In one of her latest articles she says that many of us have believed our limiting thoughts for so long that often we don’t even realize that we can actually ask for what we truly want, and that we have the power to attract whatever that may be. What we do instead is think in wonky ways that might actually sabotage an otherwise powerful intention.

She had a list of wonderful insights on what those limiting thoughts are…I’ve included just a few here:

1. We say “So that…”
   Example:  “I intend to lose some weight and get into shape SO THAT I can be energetic and happy in my daily life.”
   Using “so that” says to your inner self “I can’t have THIS if I don’t have THAT” which is very restricting.  We must be brave enough to ask “What do I ultimately want?” If you want two things simply divide them with an AND or WHILE.  “I intend to lose weight while being happy and energetic in my daily life.”  Often it is simply a matter of wording to change your entire mindset.
2. The “ing” overdose
   Example: “I intend that I am becoming more clear about my career path while my health is getting better and I am attracting a loving romantic partner.”
   Since the universe always says “yes”, its saying yes…you are becoming clear, and you are attracting a loving partner…any moment, I swear.  Don’t push your goals into the unknowing future, stick with present tense when setting your intention!
3. Scattered and Splattered
   Example: “I intend to get clear about the next steps I am taking in my life with health, lifestyle, relationships and career. Oh, and I want to lose some weight, make more money, and move somewhere else, and start my novel.”
   When your intention is scattered and splattered you will never really experience completion or success in anything. You need to be more clear, focus on one single intention, often the others will begin to manifest effortlessly. Be willing to be boring and unimpressive, just start with one thing.

 

Please read the entire article on Christine Kane’s site.   Christine Kane is the Mentor to People Who are Changing the World. She helps women and men Uplevel their lives, their businesses and their success. Her weekly Uplevel You eZine goes out to over 20,000 subscribers. If you are ready to take your life and your world to the next level, you can sign up for a F.R.E.E. subscription athttp://christinekane.com.

“Intentions compressed into words enfold magical power.” ~Deepak Chopra

This week, we are going to imagine what type of car we would really like to have – we are going to create an intention for the manifestation of that car…..  and then we are going to go take it for a TEST DRIVE!!  Yup, that’s right!!  This week’s challenge is to test drive your dream car!

Did your heart just leap or did your eyes glaze over? I know it sounds a little intimidating, and when faced with something like that people either think “Oh! Fun!” or “Yeah, that’s not gonna happen” and there are a half a dozen reasons following that statement to back it up.  Remember, we are working on our Creative Courage here, and we must do what we think we cannot…that is how we build our courage.

We must begin with our intention…can you picture your dream car in your mind yet? Can you hear the engine, feel the seats, see yourself in the rear view mirror? What color is it? Picture it sitting in your driveway, parked in your garage, and picture yourself behind the wheel. Imagine you are driving down the road in your car. Feel the joy in your heart that you finally own your dream car. Just sit with that feeling, and the picture in your mind…you are setting your intention.

Next we must find our car; it may be easy or difficult depending on your dreams…so do what needs to be done to find her. When you do find her…give her a name to build on your intention.

Third we will go take the test drive!

To assist with preparing for an actual test drive for those who might be a tad bit intimidated, I’ve located a couple of sites that have a good deal of information.  Now to be fair, they are all about when you are actually going to buy a car, and that is not what we are necessarily looking to do, but the principles are the same!

So first, if you like,aa check out the sites:

• http://usnews.rankingsandreviews.com/cars-trucks/How-to-Test-Drive-a-Car-Like-a-Pro/
• http://www.carquotes.com/buying_tips/how_to_test_drive/
• http://www.investorguide.com/igu-article-523-cars-tips-for-test-driving-a-car.html

Once you feel familiar with the manner in which it should be done, and you have set the intention in your mind, and located your baby then go for it!!!  The thrill of driving the car of your dreams will definitely outweigh the bit of fear that you may be feeling about actually doing it!!

“As soon as you truly commit to making something happen, the ‘how’ will reveal itself.” ~Anthony Robbins

If you would like additional work at being Creative-and who doesn’t…simply put on a persona when you go to the test drive.  Give your real name (because they will take your driver’s license) but make up a back story about yourself if that helps.  It’s like wearing armour, when you put on a costume, or a uniform, you can create a different persona… so go ahead and do that if it helps you to get to and through the test drive!

Our goal here is to feel the thrill of the drive and the accomplishment of doing something that you would not otherwise even attempt! This is how we build our bravery, which in turns amplifies our Creative Courage!!

“Every moment of your life is infinitely creative and the Universe is endlessly bountiful. Just put forth a clear enough request and everything your heart desires must come to you.”  ~Shakti Gawain

I test drove one of my favorite cars, it was a little unnerving to walk into the dealership, but I was very open with the sales associate, I said that I did not intend to purchase a car on that day, stating I simply wanted a test drive.  I was met with kindness and cooperation. I felt the wheel in my hands, the speed of the engine, the thrill of the ride, and I walked away a happy and stronger person!  One day I hope that the Universe finds it fit to make my dreams a reality!

Now you…GO DRIVE!!!

JeaneMargherite Meria Murray McMahon Schintgen (yep, that’s my name, don’t wear it out!)

• www.shimmerlings.com
• www.linkedin.com/in/shimmerlings
• www.facebook.com/shimmerlings
• www.twitter.com/shimmerlings

Week 4 – It’s Complimentary! Creative Courage Challenge

“The highest courage is to dare to appear to be what one is.” ~ John Lancaster Spalding

First a quick note.. we have quite a long post this week, try as I might, I could not condense it any further. I considered breaking it into two weeks, but in writing it I realized that the two components are intricately intertwined and that they must be presented together, to be practiced together….so I did break it into two parts for reading sake, but felt in critical to post it in its entirety….

“I can live for two months on a good compliment.” ~ Mark Twain

This week we are going to “…be what one is…” this week we are going to experience compliments. Giving and Receiving – with Grace. Because when we allow ourselves to be open to compliments we become more courageous. It is actually quite true…it takes a great deal of courage to believe in compliments!

Would it not be wonderful if with a few words, a couple simple compliments, we might live lighter in our hearts, and we might give that gift to others as well?  I believe once we are comfortable complimenting others, that we will at once complement others to boot!

“If people did not compliment one another there would be little society.” ~ Luc de Clapiers

To begin our journey we will need to examine both accepting compliments from others, whether we believe them to be sincere or not, as well as the proper parameters to gifting a compliment…so ours will always be sincere!  So..what exactly is a compliment anyway? Let’s explore the actual definition shall we…

com·pli·ment

noun [kom-pluh-muhnt]

1. an expression of praise, commendation, or admiration:
   A sincere compliment boosts one’s morale.
2. a formal act or expression of civility, respect, or regard:
   The mayor paid him the compliment of escorting him.
3. compliments, a courteous greeting; good wishes; regards:
   He sends you his compliments.
4. Archaic . a gift; present. And it always is (a gift that is)

When we think negatively about ourselves, we often project that feeling on to others in the form of insults and gossip. To break this cycle of negativity, get in the habit of praising other people. Refuse to engage in backstabbing gossip and make an effort to compliment those around you. In the process you’ll become well liked and build self-confidence –your own as well as others….and this in turn will build your courage muscle.  By looking for the best in others, you indirectly bring out the best in yourself.

An alarmingly large number of people do not know how to take a compliment. For some they don’t understand how to accept them properly, for others it is a self-esteem mind set, we don’t believe we deserve the positive feedback, and yet still others often don’t trust that the complimenting person is insincere.  The fact is that accepting compliments is a social grace that should be cultivated, we must all learn how to give and accept compliments with grace.

“A compliment is a verbal sunshine.” ~Robert Orben

Let’s begin with giving compliments…once we learn the proper way to give a compliment, it will be easier to learn to accept them graciously.  Most of you may be thinking…duh, I know how to give a compliment, it’s not that difficult, what’s the big deal?  But the way in which you deliver a compliment could mean the difference between the other person accepting it the way it was meant or not.

First here are some compelling reasons to give a genuine compliment…

1. Spreading Joy, you might just make someone’s day, how nice is that?!
2. Increased Positivity, aiming your focus on positive things expands your own positivity.
3. Attractiveness, being positive, showing appreciation and genuinely expressing yourself are very attractive traits. People tend to want to be around people who possess such traits.
4. Karma, what comes around goes around, you get what you give, you reap what you sow, paying it forward and reciprocity… these are wonderful things to cultivate!
5. Plus..it’s fun! When you give the gift of a genuine compliment we’ve all felt that spark of happiness ignite inward, it is fun to feel so good, for simply being kind.

Now that we know some of the awesome reasons to perform this act of wonderfulness, let’s figure out the best way to go about doing it!

The short version is:
Be Specific   Be Authentic   Be Unique   Be Personal

A SPECIFIC compliment makes a much bigger impact than a general or vague one:
“You look great today” is nice, but “That dress looks wonderful on you” is a stronger compliment and more memorable, it makes the person feel as if you truly noticed them.  You could even back up your compliment…”That dress looks wonderful on you, it rally matches your eyes.”  Another example may be instead of “Your kitchen looks great.” We might say “Your kitchen looks great; I really like the cabinetry and hardware.”  Asking additional questions then turns your compliment into the beginnings of a conversation…all you have to do is add…”where did you get the cabinets?” or “who did the work?”… a specific compliment holds incredible power.

An AUTHENTIC compliment is the only type you should ever give. As well, an authentic compliment is an extraordinary gift for the person receiving it.  Everyone has a personal character trait or gift worthy of acknowledgement, this week let’s get into the habit of finding that good in others. Often times if you are truly authentic you may be the only one who points it out for that person.

A UNIQUE compliment will not only impress but often wow the people who are blessed enough to receive them.  Use creative words, and acknowledge character traits of the people you are complimenting.  “Your dress is really nice” doesn’t carry nearly the impact of “Your dress is very eye-catching, that fabric is out of this world!”

A PERSONAL compliment is especially kind. Complimenting character traits are often the most valued and appreciated types of commendations. Take as many opportunities that you can to send these types of compliments. Hone in on a person’s character such as their perseverance, kindness, thoughtfulness, loyalty, humor, creativity, courage, calmness or anything that strikes you as inspiring. Compliment a teacher on their ability to motivate their students, or a mother on the compassion she has for her children, or the patience someone has when trying to learn something new. Try: “It took a lot of courage for you to speak up like that” and “You are so creative, I love the way you pull together your outfits” or “You are so compassionate, I love the way you use humor when you can see I’m feeling down” … When you compassionately compliment someone on their character or actions you pass on gifts that are rarely heard. Even a simply “I appreciate you for….” …whatever that might be, is an easy and incredible compliment to pass on.

NOTES:

• Be patient AND spontaneous…don’t try to manufacture the perfect compliment moment. Flattery and puffery have only the giver’s interest in mind, and is impatient, looking for the return…but being timid and waiting too long may allow the compliment to lose its timeliness.
• Don’t be looking for a ‘thank you’, just gift your compliment and breeze on back to life.
• Don’t be afraid to compliment people of authority, people in power they tend to receive less compliments.
• Be yourself, don’t feel it’s necessary to take on some kind of super persona to begin dishing out meaningful compliments to people…it will however require a certain amount of courage to speak up… and that’s what we are going to be working on this week!

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” ~Leo Buscaglia

One last tidbit about giving compliments…In my research I came across this really wonderful blog post about a dad who puts a marble in a jar each time he gives his son a compliment so that there is a visual reminder for him to pass out the compliments. It’s an incredibly way to learn to compliment our children, well written and a fabulous story, so if you have the time, his post is here:  The Marble Jar.

 

PART 2

“Insults should be written in sand, compliments carved in stone” –Arab Proverb

So you are ready to accept compliments after giving them? Many people have a great deal of difficulty accepting compliments. Most often we don’t even realize what we are doing, but in brushing off a compliment, or not owning/accepting one we are devaluing the gift we were given, and in the end that doesn’t feel good for either party.

When we accept every compliment that is offered to us… instead of undermining our self-confidence, we feed it, instead of degrading our accomplishments we would promote them, instead of tearing down relationships, we would strengthen them.  We need to own our accomplishments, be appreciative, recognize our contributions, and we need to be gracious.

Some people feel that you need to be a well-balanced, self-assured person to accept compliments affectively…but the good news is that mastering the art of receiving compliments helps you become a more well-balanced, self-assured person!

She Said: That’s a lovely dress you’re wearing.
We Said: This old thing?
Do This, Not That: Thank you so much, I fell in love with the color!

She Said: You did a great job on the project.
We Said: It didn’t turn out the way I wanted.
Do This, Not That: Thank you, I worked really hard on it.

She Said: That’s a great shirt.
We Said: Of course, I have great taste!
Do This, Not That: Thank you; it’s one of my favorites.

She Said: You have a lovely complexion!
We Said: Oh, no I don’t I hate my freckles…
Do This, Not That: Thank you so much for noticing.

She Said: Your work is amazing!
We Said: Thanks but I’ve been having difficulty with getting the details right.
Do This, Not That: Wow, thank you, I really appreciate that!

It’s the same when someone hands you a gift for whatever reason….and it seems our natural instinct is to respond with “Oh, you didn’t need to do that”  or “that wasn’t necessary” or “Oh wish you wouldn’t have”….we devalue the gift givers intentions, and possibly hurt their feelings….when all we EVER truly should say is simply “thank you”.

To build our Creative Courage we need to look at accepting a compliment as an exercise in being assertive.  It takes courage to understand, accept and admit our self-worth…so each time we accept a compliment at face value; we are in fact building our self-esteem, which in turn builds our courage.  There are many ways that we are all aware of to deflect, discount or dismiss a compliment…there are actually just as many ways, if not more, to accept a compliment.

Accepting a compliment is a recognition that you are worth the compliment, and grateful to the giver for offering it.  In accepting a compliment with gratitude and grace, we are telling the other person that we value their judgment and wisdom; it tells the other person that you appreciate what they have to say.  When we focus our attention on receiving the compliment rather than on its content, we are more apt to accept with gracefully….which of course creates more self-esteem, which in turn builds our courage.  Do you see where we are going with this?

NOTES:

First, when receiving a compliment, always smile. Smiling says a great deal without you having to say anything at all. You’ve earned a compliment, so enjoy your moment in the spotlight.

Pay attention when you are given a compliment. If the giver is met with a halfhearted response, you probably shouldn’t expect that person to send another compliment your way.

Give credit where credit is due when given a compliment. Don’t forget to share the compliment with a group of friends, coworkers or whoever else may have helped you to accomplish what you have been complimented for. This is especially important if the person giving the compliment is responsible for your success.

Embracing a genuine compliment with gratitude and grace means believing in yourself….so believe in yourself this week, get out there and compliment when you see fit, and accept them when they are given to you!!

In short….Say thank you, savor the gift, rinse and repeat!

Bonus Challenge: print this out, hang it up somewhere, give out the compliments…make someone’s day, and build your courage!
Double Extra Points if you make your own!!

Week 3 – The Eye’s Have It! Creative Courage Challenge

“Look into my eyes and hear what I’m not saying,
for my eyes speak louder than my voice ever will.” ~ Unknown

Not that long ago I discovered a photo album of a friend on Facebook…he had been collecting eyes of all things! I was mesmerized, intrigued and simply amazed at all the wonderful and astonishing things that had been accomplished in these photographs of our  “windows to the soul”…which is an English Proverb for those of you still curious from last week!

CLICK HERE TO SEE THE ENTIRE EYE COLLECTION! - CLICK ON AN IMAGE AND BROWSE THE ALBUM

While perusing this  incredible collection of fantastical things….it got me thinking about how often we truly look directly into the eyes…of ourselves and of others. I discovered that when people are speaking, often I am watching their mouths, not their eyes. This became a habit from many years working in establishments where the noise was so loud it was often impossible to hear what someone said, so I became a bit of a lip reader.  This was great talent for then, but the habit hung on, and it is no longer necessary as well as a habit I’d wanted to break. I realized that I often look at people’s mouths to hear what they are saying, but in fact it is their eyes that tell the story.

“What we learn only through the ears makes less impression upon our minds than what is presented to the trustworthy eye.” ~ Horace

This may sound strange and in perfect contradiction to what I’ve just said, but…. in practice though, it really bothers me when I am talking to someone who is wearing sunglasses and I cannot see their eyes… although I watch the mouth out of habit, I do also (I have found) look to the eyes as well; and when I cannot see a person’s eyes I am a tad bit uncomfortable.  To compound the problem, I also discovered that when I do look to someone’s eyes, and they are making direct eye contact with me, often I quickly look away, or if I force myself to keep eye contact, my eyes begin to water and I feel a bit oogly…it’s a strange dilemma don’t you think? Does anyone else experience these emotions or is it simply my own lunacy…I wondered to myself not so long ago… and in remembering this I have determined our Week Three Creative Courage Challenge.

“The eye is easily frightened.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

This week then our challenge will be to look into the eyes.  First and most importantly I want us to look into our own eyes. When we wake every morning this week, and we wander lethargic and weary into the washroom, before we wash our faces, or brush our teeth, let’s take a moment…let’s get a good look at ourselves.  Not with that critical voice, about freckles or wrinkles or hair where it should or shouldn’t be…but let’s get a good look into our very own eyes.  Don’t just look and say, ‘oh yeah, those are my eyes, look they’re brown-big surprise’…look into your eyes as you would look at someone you care deeply for.  Because we forget that we must care deeply for ourselves. WE forget that we DO care deeply for ourselves.  So each morning when we rise, like a mantra, let’s look into our own eyes and remember this love.

Yes, it is entirely possible that this will make you feel silly, or you may feel that you don’t have time because five other people share the bathroom with you or that one of those people will barge in and wonder what the heck is wrong with you because you are staring into the mirror. But it must be done.  We are here to build our courage, and we will not be intimidated by the stupid mirror now will we?!

If you cannot do it first thing in the morning, then try the rearview mirror in the car, in your child’s toy mirror, at work, in the studio, or at lunch…but we must do it.  Do it as early as you can and do it each and every day this week.

Try not to think about how anyone else would view this moment-this moment is for you….just concentrate on looking yourself in the eyes and attempting to convey how much you care about who you are and the great gift that you are in this world.  That is a wonderful way to begin the day, don’t you think?!! We can completely change the way we feel about ourselves by simply looking into our own nonjudgmental eyes each morning, each day. You will be building courage you didn’t even know you were missing.

“The voyage of discovery lies not in finding new landscapes, but in having new eyes.” ~ Marcel Proust

BUT WAIT THERE’S MORE!!  While doing my own internal research for this week’s post, I also discovered that often we avoid other people’s eyes whether or not they are familiar to us.  The clerk at the checkout, the postal worker at the counter, the waiter or waitress at lunch, the barista making our coffee, the customers that come into our stores, the people we lunch with, even co-workers, our friends and sometimes our family.

We are often so busy looking about, attempting to find something, figuring out our next move, or what we will say next that we are simply too lazy to make the effort to look into someone’s eyes. What we don’t always understand is that it could take just that one moment of time to make another person feel worthy while we build our own courage and self-esteem.

When you are out in public, on the street, buying groceries, ordering coffee, at work, meeting with your mother’s group, lunching with your coworkers….look into other people’s eyes!

When the clerk hands you your change, look them in the eye when you say ‘thank you’.  If you unexpectedly bump into someone or need to squeeze through, when you say ‘excuse me’…look them in the eyes! When someone asks you a question, look that person in the eyes when you answer.

This is a much more difficult task than you might think…but it will make a HUGE difference in the manner in which you view your environment, your surroundings and believe it or not, it will empower you!  You will see and discover things you may have been missing, you will feel as if you have an innate kindness that you may not have thought you possessed, you will grow your courage and become a better person through simple eye contact!

“Seek the wisdom of the ages, but look at the world
through the eyes of a child.” ~Ron Wild

While you dare yourself this week to look not only into your own beautiful eyes, but into others as well…note how it makes you feel…does your heart jump, do you feel stronger, are you more self-assured that you are aware of your surroundings, do you feel like you looked at someone you’ve known for a while but just saw them truly for the first time?  As well, note how others act, are they taken by surprise, do they look back at you, is there a momentary connection, do they look grateful? Young or old, strange or familiar, happy or sad, see the eyes…and let the eyes see you.

It will be through this “new” experience of looking in the eyes of everyone, including yourself, that will help you gain courage, continue to pique your curiosity, and help you to see things in a whole new way.  This action will also give others a new way to see you…even those you will never see again.

“Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through
each other’s eyes for an instant?” ~Henry David Thoreau

Good luck this week, and have fun looking into as many eyes as you can…and don’t forget your own….here’s to building our courage!

JeaneMargherite Meria Murray McMahon Schintgen  (yep, that’s my name, don’t wear it out!)

• www.shimmerlings.com
• www.linkedin.com/in/shimmerlings
• www.facebook.com/shimmerlings
• www.twitter.com/shimmerlings

Curiosity Personified!

Here is an artist I just discovered…through another artist friend. She was so curious about how other artist finish the back of their brooches, she is creating an entire exhibit about the BACK of brooches! A good read, a great idea, and I’m considering it!! Check it out!

THIS is exactly where our curiosity can open up our minds, and get ideas going…we discover things that we often don’t think twice about until we actually delve into it!  Lorena Angulo is a wonderful artist to begin discovering!

Let’s draw from her action, let’s discover something we were Curious about, and learn everything we can about it…we still have a few more days before we are on to the next challenge….so let’s take it to the next level!  I’m not saying we need to create an exhibit to display our findings…just that we should delve a bit deeper now that we’ve been working with our curiosity for several days!  Let me know what you find out!!

JeaneMargherite Meria Schintgen (yep, that’s my name, don’t wear it out!)

• www.shimmerlings.com
• www.linkedin.com/in/shimmerlings
• www.facebook.com/shimmerlings
• www.twitter.com/shimmerlings

Week 2 – Curious George Creative Courage Challenge

Curiosity is one of the most powerful things you own!

As we are working to build courage, we must inevitably work to dealing with fear as well.  Because, when we are stuck in a place of fear, we are closed up and unable to see the true possibilities that lead us to our courage and thus our creativity. For Creatives and Artists this is tantamount to emotional suicide!  Our fear and curiosity are at constant odds with each other.  When fear wins the battle, we do not act, we react, and we immediately lose.  So the challenge really is to move away from fear, by choosing and creating opportunities to build our curiosity so that it is stronger than our fear.  Simply put, having more curiosity will in fact build your courage!

“Faced with the choice between changing one’s mind and proving that there is no need to do so, almost everyone gets busy on the proof.” - John Kenneth Galbraith

So…let’s get curious…..what’s your best friend’s middle name? Where did your brother in law grow up? Who was Snow White’s stepmother? How do you recover a chair seat? At a movie theater, which armrest is yours?  Why doesn’t McDonald’s sell hot dogs? When does is stop being ‘partly cloudy’ and start being ‘partly sunny’? If bread is square, why is lunch meat round? Why is Greenland covered in ice and Iceland covered in greenery? Why are men and women’s shoes different sizes? How many seconds are in a day? Why do we have daylight savings time? Why do you hear the sound of the ocean when you put a shell up to your ear? Why does a peppermint candy placed in a soda bottle make it overflow?  These may seem on face value as nonsensical or questions that don’t matter…even a waste of time perhaps. But do you know the answers to any of them? Are you even curious as to the answers? Is there a place these answers can be found? Do you know how to find the answers?  Enter…Curiosity! It’s fun and interesting!  You have the opportunity learn, enjoy and grow in your life, your art and your heart!

Now…for the Fear:  We humans create situations in our own minds. We fear things we have only “thought” of and have not acted on.  This fortunately is a learned behavior, and it can be unlearned.  Think for a moment of how a baby learns to live and move in its environment…it is all through insatiable curiosity. Can I reach that? Can I put that in my mouth? I wonder what will happen if…?  They are not afraid because they do not know what will happen.  But as babies and children grow they learn and are taught by others around them, they learn to be less curious, they learn to guess at what may happen and not to take so many risks; as those risks may result in pain, rejection or failure. As we grow our curiosity dies, fear wins and we lose.

“Nothing is a waste of time if you use the experience wisely” ~Rodin

Most often, it is only in our mind that the fear actually resides. It is in the thoughts we have created ourselves concerning the situation we believe we are afraid of.  We need to change our programing, change our learned behavior. Instead of saying “I can’t afford that” KNOW that you CAN in fact afford anything you want…you would just have to work out the details.  Changing “I can’t afford that” – which is defeating, deflating and self-abusive and not true – to “I could buy that if I really wanted to” – which is empowering, exciting and hopeful well, and true.  If you REALLY wanted to, you could buy it, you would just need to work out the how (save the money, borrow the money, wait for your next paycheck, etc) but you COULD buy it if you really wanted to.  Just changing the mindset, changing the thought process makes all the difference in the world.  You go from feeling poor and unprivileged because you “can’t” afford it, to feeling powerful, energized and happier. Thinking “I could afford it”  puts your brain in positive gear, instead of negative, and gives your heart an opportunity to hope and open up to the possibilities.  It’s the same thing with our fear…examples:

Fearful thought: I’m afraid I’m never going to make my website work effectively
Curious thought: I wonder how much more I’ll sell if I get my site to work effectively?

Fearful thought: I’m not an actual writer, I’m afraid no one will read my blog.
Curious thought: I’m curious how many people will work along with me on my blog.

Fearful thought: I’m never going to be able to make the budget work this month!
Curious thought: What can I do to make the budget work the best way possible?

Fearful thought: I’m afraid to ask that person out, I could get rejected.
Curious thought: I wonder what will happen if I ask that person out?

Fearful thought: I’ll never be able to quit smoking; I’ve been doing it for so long.
Curious thought: If I quit smoking I wonder if I could get someone to quit with me?

Fearful thought: This positive thinking doesn’t work, I’m afraid I’m just wasting my time.
Curious thought: If I give this an honest try, I wonder how I could change my life?

Fearful thought: I’m afraid to change my job, but I’m so unhappy.
Curious thought: I’m curious what kind of job I would enjoy?

Using the words “curious” and “wonder”, or simply changing the statement of fear into a question of curiosity can change your perspective immediately…no matter what the circumstances.  These words, this action… it opens up our minds and hearts to creative ways to deal with our fearful thought, and it keeps the levels of energy shifting from fear to excitement.

Most people (think of yourself) when they fear something, they avoid taking action until the fear goes away. Often we will soothe our egos by saying, “I’ll do it when I’m feeling more confident.” Or “I’m just having a bad day, I’ll do it tomorrow.” Or “I just really don’t want to.” – not even acknowledging the fear to deal with it. We put it off and put it off, and often times when we do actually accomplish the task things run more smoothly, our life is a little better, and we always feel a spring of excitement for facing our fear…so why not just do it in the beginning and WIN over fear, quicker, earlier, faster, sooner and enjoy the rewards for longer?

Because the real problem we are faced with is that fear never just goes away…we can tamp it down, we can ignore it, we can act as if it doesn’t exist. But it does. It’s there. It’s a natural part of life.  Most people have it backwards, they believe they will overcome fear and then they are able to accomplish the tasks. But in fact, again, as we discovered in last weeks blog…. first you must do the thing you fear, then you gain the courage.  We must remember that fact as we work through our weekly tasks.  You aren’t going to ‘get the courage up’….you must do the thing and the courage will come! I promise!

“Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear – not absence of fear. Except a creature be part coward it is not a compliment to say that it is brave.” ~Seneca

What we need is more curiosity and less fear. I believe the key this week then  might be that we act more our shoe size not our age…we need to keep our sense of wonder, as a child does.  If we approach someone in a social situation and we are not met with a good response, keep your sense of wonder….”That person didn’t seem to want to talk…I wonder if this other person does?”

Think less about what the outcome might be and let your curiosity lead you…because people say that life ebbs and flows, but in fact fear ebbs and curiosity flows.

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do.”  ~Mark Twain

During our courage building we have no room for fear, it create a division in our hearts, minds and worlds…so we are going to shift this week to being curious, asking questions, making requests, and we are not going to complain or worry about the answers. We are going to ask questions to confirm our curiosity, not make statements. When we use our curiosity our perceptions and prejudges go wooshing out the door this week and a whole new world is going to open up to us!  This is not just in our own thinking, not just in our minds. I want you to be curious and use your curiosity! When you don’t see the price for something, don’t be afraid to ask. Inquire about how something is made. Ask for directions. Engage another artist on how they perform their craft, or ask about a specific project. Ask your best friend for a middle name, an older person what year they were born, your neighbor where they grew up. Look up a new project and learn how to accomplish it!

This week we are not going to completely change our mindset, but we are going to open up to our curiosity. Because curiosity is full of anticipation and enthusiasm, it opens you up in a way you may not be aware of! When you are open and feeling enthusiastic and curious your mind shifts to having more fun things to focus on. Your mind knows you are about to learn, discover, explore…whether that is just a bit of information or a whole new skill to accomplish yourself.

Be Curious this week! Ask someone where something came from or was originally found, ask a friend about the town they grew up in, ask a kid what they would like to do this summer. Wander into a store you’ve never visited before and ask the sales clerk a question about a product. Drive down a road you pass all the time and wonder where it leads, answer your curiosity.  If you have a question…ASK.  Ask, wonder, wander, search, delve, question, and then learn!

Post and let us know what you discovered, what you asked and could not answer, tell me where you wandered and what surprises you’ve uncovered, let me know if you know the answers to any of the questions in the beginning…and how you found those answers! By week’s end I hope that  your Fearful Thoughts are turning into Curious Thoughts and that we have lost of fun getting us there!!.

JeaneMargherite Meria Schintgen (yep, that’s my name, don’t wear it out!)

• www.shimmerlings.com
• www.linkedin.com/in/shimmerlings
• www.facebook.com/shimmerlings
• www.twitter.com/shimmerlings

Paper Jewelry

This is a repost from October that was accidentally deleted and a few folks asked for it….

I’ve started the journey of reclaimed and upcycled jewelry pieces several years ago, and have had a great time working in that capacity…creating beauty from what others thought was simply to be discarded. A process I actually began when my jewelry career began, at the age of 10.

My grandmother had passed away, and being the only girl in my family, I inherited a large box of costume jewelry…”Grandma Jewelry” if you will, as to a ten year old, because as beautiful and sparkly as it all was, there wasn’t a single piece in the box I could wear without feeling like a grandma.

After some thought, and much discussion (in my own head and a little out loud to myself) over whether or not my grandmother would be angry with me for what I was planning; I began to disassemble the pieces in the box. I took every single solitary piece apart, and before me lay piles of shimmering treasure I could not have even imagined was encompassed in that box of costume grandma jewelry!

At this point I began ‘designing’ different pieces that I found pretty and more appropriate to accessorize my t-shirts and blouses that I wore with my jeans. I wore my first piece to school the next day, all together proud and embarrassed at the same time. It was no secret that our large family had little money, and I wore hand me downs not just from family but from friends, and I thought that I might very well be teased for my now hand me down jewelry, as I often was for my clothes….I strode in that day with my head held high, come what may!

The reaction at my elementary school was quite the opposite of what I feared! To my surprise I was fawned over, and asked a million questions about where I had found this fabulous jewelry adornment….and thus my next struggle emerged: Should I tell them they were my grandmother’s before they were mine? Should I lie and make up a place I knew no one could ever find? My emotionally teetering landed on “I made them!” at which point most everyone said (as 10 year old do) “ooooooo, will you make me something?!”

I thus sold my “inheritance” from my grandmother to the girls at school for dollars and change until it was all gone. I even sold the pieces I was wearing on that first day. I knew my grandmother would have been proud, because I felt proud – and had made a tidy sum to purchase new “materials” from garage sales and resale stores. I saved a single ring that belonged to my grandmother, and I keep it in my studio to remind me from whence my ability blossomed.

Now…so many years later…(we won’t say exactly how many) I am at it again! Disassembling and reassembling the past and the present. Reworking, recreating and doing the best I can not to discard anything!!

My newest adventure is paper jewelry! There are so many beautiful papers out there, and scraps of paper we think to be past it’s usefulness, when in fact it can be remade into something beautiful! I’ve tested the waters with some hair accessories:
http://store.shimmerlings.com/accessories.html

   

And many other designs like them….I’m off to my studio now, for the first time in a long time, filled with inspiration and joy! I have so many ideas in my head I can’t wait to start creating!!! Stay tuned!

JeaneMargherite Meria Schintgen (yep, that’s my name, don’t wear it out!)

• www.shimmerlings.com
• www.linkedin.com/in/shimmerlings
• www.facebook.com/shimmerlings
• www.twitter.com/shimmerlings

Video Trouble

Okay a couple of people are having trouble with the video…it could be because of my new Windows 7, but here is another try or use the links to get to it:

or direct link, click or paste into browser:  http://www.ted.com/talks/view/lang/en//id/453

Don’t give up! That may  be a test!!!

JMMS

Happy New Courage for the New Year!!! Creative Courage Challenge

‘The world has the habit of making room for the one whose words and actions show that they know where they are going‘ – Napoleon Hill

Well, here it is….the first week of the New Year, and the week we begin building our courage, as Artists as Creatives and as Individuals.  This will be a fun train, a challenging, interesting, bi-polar ride! We will have differing tasks to complete from simple to difficult, and we will have a full week to accomplish each goal…only once if we feel that’s all that’s necessary or multiple times if we dare to dream!

My own experience has shown me that we can read as many books and blogs, listen to people speak at conferences, hire life coaches, and banter with friends…but unless we actually DO something, we will not grow, we will not learn and we will not accomplish our goals.

SO to that end, I’ve created an outline of mini Acts of Courage (Or Creative Courage Builders) that we can accomplish one week at a time that will help us work, develop and grow our courage … in small baby steps.  Things that are challenging of course, but not so intimidating that we won’t do them – hopefully.  The main point is to DO the tasks, not to simply read them, but to DO them….it is our actions that make what we do possible.  Reading, saying it sounds good and you are going to do it – it way different than actually taking the time to accomplish, and flex our courage goals.

I must admit that I am the perfect example of, hmmm…lets just say it out loud shall we…LAZY….if a thing appears too difficult from the star or requires too much effort initially, I may lose interest half way through or not even attempt it.  My goal here is to start slowly, to work our courage muscles a little bit at a time so by the middle or end of the year we will look at a more difficult challenge and say “Really? Come on that’s so easy!”   There will be funny silly challenges sprinkled all over the place,  so please don’t give up and don’t give in to the lazy naysayer of your ego!  This is for everyone! I am especially gearing towards Creatives and Artists, because we often have trouble with courage outside of our art, but I can guarantee that all of these tasks and accomplishments are for everyone, everywhere!

Its so common place to second guess ourselves when we are trying to do something totally new and generally beyond our comfort zone. Its natural. Yet once we are used to our creative process, and build our courage…just as with any experience, it becomes more familiar – we begin to notice certain milestones and recognize what is happening at various stages of living our dream and exploring our passions! With familiarity of course comes comfort…and our comfort zone is autonomously and actively enlarged!

It takes great courage to commit to our projects, our dreams, to explore our passions, our art – our creative process – don’t give up just yet. In fact, the fear that you are experiencing is actually a good sign. When we begin our creative process on any level, or when we commit to a project – often after the initial excitement, folks sometimes begin to experience  fear (even paralyzing fear) that can stop us in our tracks, and it makes us question whether this is something we want after all.  I urge you if you feel this fear at any point in this project, that you push through it, experience the fear….”Feel the fear and do it anyway” as one of my favorite business books from the 90′s quoted constantly!!

This is a convo from a movie that you may or may not have seen called “Three Kings”….the scene is a quick one between Major Archie Gates (George Clooney) and a younger solider Conrad Vig (Spike Jonze)  there is a plan of attack, that has some of the team has doubts about….

Archie: You’re scared right?

Conrad: Maybe

Archie: They way it work is, you do the thing you’re scared shitless of, and you get the courage AFTER you do it, not before you do it.

Conrad: That’s a dumbass way to work. It should be the other way around!

Archie: I know.  …. That’s the way it works.

It’s a scene in the movie that goes so quickly if you weren’t looking for it, you might miss it, but also pivotal in the action of the movie. A soldier was motivated to go beyond himself when he was impossibly frightened, worried, scared, concerned,and doubtful about what was about to happen and the outcome of those actions.  The dialog though was particularly spot on.  One never ‘gets’ the courage to jump off the high dive, they climb the ladder scared inside regardless of what they show on the outside.  We only gain courage AFTER we accomplish the act. The more often we practice what we fear, the more courageous we become – which is why I suggest doing the tasks more than once. It gets easier and easier as our courage builds and grows…..THAT is exactly what we are going to do this year!! By the end of 2012, you’ll look at your unfinished business plan, your website, the world… and say “What was I so scared about!”

All of the mini things that we blow off on a regular basis, thinking they are no big deal… well, we are going to accomplish, conquer, and take advantage of all those things this year.  We are going to use that rush of adrenalin that fear brings about as FUEL to accomplish what we want!!  We are going to slowly build what needs building, so that we can improve ourselves, our craft, our business sense, all of it! By the end of 2012 you will not even recognize your artist courage!!

For those who generally need the quick fix, who don’t want to wait a full year to build your courage muscle….trust me when I tell you that it will NOT take a full year to feel it…I’ve just planned a full year of tasks…you will begin to feel the effects fairly quickly, depending on how strong your courage muscle is now and how often you are willing to complete the tasks – so stay with us – it’s entirely in your hands how hard you work! By the end of the year, I’m hoping you will be able to accomplish that “BIG” task you have always thought was too big…but really isn’t!

Those of you that think it may be too much…please don’t worry, I’m here with you!  I’m not a life coach that has accomplished every success I’ve ever planned and telling you how to do it from experience…we are doing this together! This is a life experiment that I fully believe and am invested in.  I have done some work with these steps, and KNOW it is the right way to work with most Artists and Creatives.  I’ll be working with you and accomplishing these goals the same time you are….I’ll be scared and worried and intimidated the same time you are – or maybe at different times.  My point is that I’m not just writing this…I’m WORKING this! We are working this together!!  So let’s do it!!  We’ll keep each other going!!

Remember that even the most confident of people always feel an element of fear when they step outside their comfort zone. Always!  Try to think of anyone that you can imagine that is successful, anyone from the POTUS to your current next door neighbor who has a beautiful garden…that person has felt fear, but they faced it and gave it a go anyhow! Use your fear to build your confidence!  We are all a little (or a lot) afraid of roller coasters…that’s what makes them sooo exciting!! But we get our ticket, and we wait in line and we get on the ride….despite the fear…because the pay off is about 30 seconds of extreme fun we can not get elsewhere!  Well, I urge you to get your ticket and get in line, because you may feel fear here, but the pay off I promise will be waaaay more than 30 seconds!!!!  Ha!!! Let’s get to our first challenge!!!!!

By the by….as you read the post through the next few weeks or months, I beg of you not to give in when you feel as if  …”I can do that already, I don’t need to accomplish the challenge” or “that’s too hard, I’m not doing it”…

“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy!”  ~Dale Carnegie

And if you feel as if you don’t have time to work the weekly challenge, as if the opportunity will not arise, because you are not leaving the house, studio or whatever or you’ll be on vacation, whatever….when you don’t feel as if you need to actually DO the challenge, (don’t forget I am a Creative too…and I know how you think!) when you think that you don’t need to actually DO it, that just reading about it will be fine, and  if a situation comes about that’s great, but just READING about it will help you to understand the meaning of it…I implore you, I beg you, I am on my hands and knees telling you….you need to actually DO the challenges, regardless of how silly or difficult they appear on the web! : ) You need to actually make the effort, do the task, accomplish the bullet point.  Please don’t just “know” you can without making the effort…you will only lose the lesson, and that doesn’t help anyone!

“Nothing builds self-esteem and self-confidence like accomplishment.” ~ Thomas Carlyle

I’ve also decided to give you a list of the challenge items or blog titles for the bulk of the year…I believe that I’ve already bloggidy blogged longer than I wanted too.  Too much information is not always better….as all artists know… “Part of art is knowing when to stop”….so I will stop, give you your challenge and I will see you next week!

Our first task is going to be to take 20 mins for ourselves as creative people and artists, to gain some perspective in the minds of other creative people. I would like you to please watch/listen to this inspiring video, in which  Elizabeth Gilbert, who is the best selling author of Eat Pray Love.  She shares her thoughts and insight on the creative process and has an incredibly interesting and amusing thought process.  The challenge is to actually LISTEN to it, WATCH it, listen.  Don’t have it on in the background while you are cooking or working on paperwork.  Actually take 20 minutes (which isn’t very long) and allow an incredibly creative person to join you on your journey.  I believe the part that got to me and made me giggle the most is when she talks about how creative people across all genres have a reputation for enormously mentally unstable!  Well, duh! LOL

”Observe the wonders as they occur around you.  Don’t claim them. Feel the artistry moving through and be silent.”— Khalil Gibran

Truly, take the time and ENJOY the next 20 mins….and let me know if you’ve ever “brushed up against that thing”!

JeaneMargherite Meria Schintgen (yep, that’s my name, don’t wear it out!)

• www.shimmerlings.com
• www.linkedin.com/in/shimmerlings
• www.facebook.com/shimmerlings
• www.twitter.com/shimmerlings

Our List of Weights and Measures

Happy New Year everyone!! I have been working on the blog, and have been a bit worried about the first blog of the year…quite a bit of intimidation there, making sure it’s right…it’s one of my ‘challenges’ right now.  I’m not quite finished tweeking it, but didn’t want to leave you all in the lurch…and I also knew that most of you would be interested in what I might have planned for the rest of the year.  So I decided to make a preliminary list of all the blogs I have planned! I’m very excited!! This is not in any type of order, just a list of what’s happening! These are the “weights” we will be using to build our muscles! The “measures” as to how we will gauge our process! I’m really looking forward to the next few weeks and hope you are looking forward to this project as much as I am!!!

So, here’s a little taste of what I’ve got planned!

• The Sound of Music
• Green With Envy
• Character Witness
• And The Winner Is…
• Googley Map
• It’s A Small World Afterall
• Playdate Personified
• Money for Nothing
• Staycation Test
• Pink Cadillac
• I Wanna Thank You
• Bachelor#3?
• Joy To The World
• The Eyes Have It
• Solitary
• Somebody’s Hero
• Not Guilty!
• Front & Center
• SAY
• R U Kidding Me?!
• Curious George
• Walking Tall
• Patience…A Virtue?
• Two Steps Back
• Blogedy Blog Blog
• Take This Job And…
• Split Personality
• Easy A
• The Morning After
• You Ate What?!
• Bad To The Bone
• Buttcrack of Dawn
• Dis A Pointer
• UnderPerfect
• No Way Jose!
• Judge Judy
• Just Breathe
• Socialcicity
• My Genius Costume
• A Word From Our Sponsor
• I Urge You
• Unblockentitice
• Swing Shift
• Excuuuuussse Meeee!
• Time to Make the Copies
• Potential for Brilliance
• Semi-Nar
• A Good Bra
• Vampires & Werewolves
• You’re Speaking My Language
• Love It or Leave It
• Vampairitious
• Speaking My Language
• Love It or Leave It
• Big Fat Juicy
• Pick A Card

Cheers and Welcome to the Ride!!  Wwwwheeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!

JeaneMargherite Meria McMahon Murray Schintgen (yep, that’s my name, don’t wear it out!)